Joyce, Lucy, & Judy's Culture Shock

Joyce (the lady on the left) is the one we pay to do our laundry and some of our house cleaning once a week. Her husband left her some time ago and she is raising two children. Joyce and Lucy are active in a small Anglican church just outside our campus. They currently live with Phyllis and Jon Masso, while Joyce is attending college classes. On Sunday, Phil and Judy gave Joyce and Lucy 2 of the 12 t-shirts we had brought. This was in celebration of Lucy (14 yrs old) leaving on Monday (16 Feb) for an Anglican boarding school. Lucy was one of the top students in her grade 8 class and earned a scholarship to be able to attend a private high school.

I (Judy is writing) have been somewhat overwhelmed with the plight of women in Kenya. This past week I had two of Phil's female students for afternoon tea. It is quite different to read about things such as wife inheritance than to actually talk with the women affected. Wife inheritance happens when a woman's husband dies. She is expected to become the wife of a brother-in-law. If he is good, he takes care of her children. Any land/possessions involved goes to the husband's family. If she doesn't cooperate with this custom (which they tell me is more common in western Kenya), she loses the land/possessions anyway and maybe even her children.

One of the young women told me her father had 3 wives. He died when she was 8 years old and her family was again assimilated into the community of relatives. Trying to be positive, I pointed out that at least there is provision in community. But, she strongly pointed out how different my widowhood had been in the States; that my husband's relatives didn't take my property at the death of my husband and I didn't lose that when I decided to marry Phil. They also told me that in the courts culture wins out over a will. This was a real eye opener for me. These two very intelligent women students will be part of the change here in Kenya.

On Saturday, Phyllis Masso and I took Joyce and Lucy shopping in Athi River, in preparation for Lucy's departure for boarding school. To my surprise, two of the purchases were a 20-gal bucket with a lid and an aluminum plate and cup. Lucy will use the bucket to do her laundry, etc., while she will wash and take care of her own eating utensils.

While we were shopping in Athi River (which is an amazing maze of small shops on dirt, trash strewn roads) Judy observed a small boy of about 2 1/2 years pull down his pants and use the dirt as a toilet. The mother calmly came out of the shop, wiped his bum, swept dirt over the pile and then swept it into a dust pan for disposal. I was glad to see that they care about disposal.

On our way home, one of Phyllis' car tires blew; actually the tire radials separated and the rubber shredded. Three Kenyan men quickly came to our rescue and changed the tire. Fortunately we had a spare as Phyllis said they'd had 3 punctures in 3 weeks. Joyce told us the men said to her, "You'd better tell those mzungus (whites) to pay us good." We gave each Ksh 50 (about 65 cents) and they left very happy.

Being honest-- For the past week I have been feeling like "I'm ready to go home." I remember reading that the joy of newness wears off after about 6-8 weeks and culture shock sets in (I'm there). Thankfully you then press on and eventually a deeper sense of appreciation of the people sets in (I'll get there). It is interesting to me that Phil isn't dealing with things at the same level as me. I tell him it's because of his math/science, even-keeled personality. We're a good team!